Wednesday, 24 August 2016

Do They Really..?



...because me, I'd prefer to blame the idiots that drive them. But it seems I'm fighting a losing battle:


*sighs*

I Think You've Misunderstood Your Own Title...

The council's regeneration boss Cllr Phil Riley said: "The housing market is a commercial market and developers pick the sites that they want. It would be completely invalid for us to turn this application down because there are a number of brownfield sites in the area."
'Regeneration' is meant to be just that. Regenerating previously-disused areas, not parts of the green belt!
Cllr Slater said: "There are plenty of brownfield sites in Darwen that need filling. "There is no need to build here in this environment. There is deer there. I know that because I grew up there.
"The idea that the roundabout at the bottom will be able to take the increased amount of traffic is ludicrous.
"People will never get out of that junction. There are also other environmental concerns about flooding and the pits.
"It would cause all sorts of problems. We want to attract business people to this borough and attract executive housing but we are damaging the area as we do it."
Precisely. It makes no sense to have to put all the infrastructure in place, when you already have underlying infrastructure in those brownfield site.

Anyone who has ever played a city-building sim will tell you that.

Tuesday, 23 August 2016

Why, Yes, Of Course The Internet Will Stop...


...if you just explain to them how the mockery is hurting your feelings:
"We are not amused by the memes, petitions and signs about Harambe," Thane Maynard, Cincinnati Zoo director, told the Associated Press.
"Our zoo family is still healing, and the constant mention of Harambe makes moving forward more difficult for us. We are honoring Harambe by redoubling our gorilla conservation efforts and encouraging others to join us."
Yeah, they definitely have a course where they practice this passive aggressive whining, and they clearly send their zoo staff on it.
Other voices on the internet have said that the jokes have now gone too far and should be brought to an end. WCPO-TV web editor James Leggate recently started his own petition, for instance, which asks that petitions about Harambe are stopped.
"At first, the petitioners had good intentions," he wrote. "But then the goofuses of the Internet hopped on the Harambe train for their jollies, and it has gotten out of control."
Hey, I'm sure they'll listen to you, James...

Perfectly Understandable...

A 49-year-old man has been spared jail after carrying two cut-throat razors, a knuckle duster and a metal-headed walking stick in public.
Good grief! Where?
Dagenham resident Leonard Lowe...
Ah. Well, it is the 'nam....

Monday, 22 August 2016

'Mother Of The Year' Title Is A Shoo-in....

A distraught mother has spoken of her horror after her five-year-old son managed to escape and was found at the side of a busy Bolton road.
Every parent's nightmare!
The mother-of-three explained that her son, who was dressed in his pyjamas when she last saw him had said that he was going to bed around 4pm.
She said: "I was trying to settle my baby who is three months old and he said he was tired and so wanted to go to bed.
"He had put his television on in his room and put his teddies in his bed to make it look like he was in there so I had absolutely no idea that he wasn't there when I walked past."
Eh..? That sounds more like the sort of routine you'd expect in a prison wing, doesn't it?
As officers searched the Hall i' th’ Wood estate to try to reunite the pair, the mother was unaware of what was unfolding outside.
She explained: "I noticed that I had about 30 missed calls on my phone and it was my friend checking that my son was in the house because there were a lot of police on the estate and he has tried to escape before."
*boggle*
The story was reported by The Bolton News on Sunday and the mother was left distraught by comments from other readers.
Hmmm, I'll just bet! The truth hurts.
She said: "It's really hard bringing up three children on your own and I know that's not an excuse."
Correct. It isn't. So why bring it up?
"Bad things do happen but you never think that they will happen to you. I have been so upset reading what people have been saying about me being a bad mother. I was up all night crying."
The mother said that she will be changing the hiding place for her keys to make it harder for the little boy to escape in future.
I suppose keeping more of an eye on him in the future isn't going to be an option?
She added: "He might be five but he's got developmental and behavioural problems and he needs help.
"I'm hoping now that he can gets the help that he needs."
Has he got these? Or has he just got a useless, incompetent parent?
A spokesman for the police said that their family and social services department were looking in to the circumstances as to how the incident happened.
I think we all know how, don't we?

I Pretty Much Guarantee It...

Seth Collins, mitigating, told the same court on Friday: “He is ashamed and remorseful for stooping so low.”
He said Chambers failed to attend court once because his mother had died.
*rolls eyes*

An excuse so daft only a magistrate could believe it. And so they did!
Alwyn Hollins, chairman of the bench, spared Chambers jail but told him he was in the “last chance saloon”.
Not, I suspect, for the first time!
For all the offences, he ordered Chambers to complete five months of community service, in which he was required to abide by an electronically-monitored curfew. He must also pay £85 court costs, a £85 victim surcharge and £15 to each of the charities.
Tearful Chambers replied: “Thank you so much. You will never see me again.
Oh yes we will....

Saturday, 20 August 2016

"...you just don't expect it to happen in your town."

I can't think why. All the hallmarks are pretty familiar.

For instance, type of 'pet':
American bulldogs are strong, stocky dogs, which have been kept as pets in the UK and around the world for centuries.
A male dog weighs about 45 kilograms when fully grown, and lives for between 10 and 15 years if healthy.
American bulldogs are not on the government's banned dogs list, which is made up of four breeds of dog which it is illegal to own or sell. They are often confused with pit bull terriers, which are on the banned list.
Conditions in which it was kept:
The dog is believed to have been kept in a wooden outhouse at the side of the property, which was yesterday being examined by forensic officers.
Neighbour Scott Nowell, 19, who called the police after realising what had happened, said: ‘They have only had the dog about a week because we heard it barking.’
And type of owner:
Jade Dunne, 29, who lives in the house is understood to have been arrested for allowing a dog to be dangerously out of control and remains in police custody.
She is believed to have four children, including one young son around the same age as Dexter, who was heard screaming by neighbours during the horrific attack.
The demand for collective punishment, because a chihuahua owned by a 70 year old lady or a collie owned by a working farmer is exactly the same as a four-legged status dog/weapon kept by a chav:
The Labour MP Barry Sheerman, who represents Huddersfield, called for a new system of dog licensing...
...
He said: “These two deaths in four days mean we have got to seriously look at the evidence of a proper licensing system for dogs. Other parts of the world do it so much better than us.”
...
“My son recently homed two kittens from Battersea Dogs & Cats Home. There was a rigorous interview, a rigorous check on background and a home visit. Why can’t we have a dog licence system of that quality up and down the country?”
It could have been any one of the 356 posts I've written on this subject (minus - so far! - the police or local council indifference), couldn't it?